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The Solace In Suffering

by Shame Spiral

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1.
i find a sort of happiness when i inflict pain on myself i feel some sense of peace with a razor pressed to my wrist i made friends with the voices in my head ...and as the seasons change everything stays the same but somewhere along the way in the midst of it all i found the s o l a c e i n s u f f e r i n g
2.
another morning covered in sweatAnother morning covered in sweat Suicidal thoughts Bloodshot eyes filled with Dread It’s the same cycle that i’ve tried to break But all i did was run around in circles that’s when my eyes opened Its an off color entrance With a blind exit Cause when i leave i’ll be swinging from the tree Blind to the ones who told me Forever sleep Forever Sleep I’m trying to put myself back together But i’m stuck in a world where the suffering is pleasure all my thoughts are why i weep i’m tired of dreaming about dying I cry tears of blood For the ones i hurt Now my eyes shut As i see a solution by slamming on the gas pedal And that’s why i didn’t stop at the red light I pray for release as i drive towards the headlights You had so much to live for all I had were closed doors
3.
Mendicant 02:30
a flawed system of denominations a whole nation on their knees collecting money from the poor while priests live in luxury its such a jagged concept using a book as a reason to hate such a fictitious mindset under the steeple where you congregate why must you force it just cut the bullshit you bible thumping hypocrite i don’t want it one nation under god? one nation under fear if god’s so great then why does cancer exist? a gun to your head and a blade to your wrist something a bible verse will never fix i found more faith in myself than a man on a crucifix a faith fueled by violence you're all self righteous a belief surrounded in aversion your thought on heaven is so certain bow your fucking head pray to your false deity realize your god is dead welcome to reality
4.
5.
Stuck 03:16
held captive a ball and chain set free with a bullet to the brain my hands shake fumble with the trigger death's waiting with open arms a steady mind is hard to maintain obsessively dreaming of my own grave cut my loose from my misery pull the plug send me down the drain i'm lost in oblivion blinded by darkness i try to climb out of this hole but it's a long way back to the top its a long way back back to the top its a long way back the pain never stops terrified of life biting down on the knife god tell me what i did to deserve this misery is a son of a bitch this old soul has been laid to rest torture and agony have been suppressed
6.

credits

released December 14, 2018

Lyrics by Andy Reynolds, Bailey Olinger & Will Rodgers

Recorded, mixed & mastered by Sean Robinson at Upside Down Audio in Vienna, Virginia

Album art by Dave Petersen

Logo by Jason Frazier

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Shame Spiral Virginia

Vocals: Bailey
Guitar: Alfredo
Guitar: Gage
Bass: Clark
Drums: Luke

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